Sometimes the problem is personality type. An organization might be a right match from a skills perspective, but the new employee’s style of working might not be compatible with those around them. At first everyone is willing to “try to make it work,” but over time the mismatch becomes noticeable.
A brilliant young woman got a job working for a consulting company. She was very good at what she did and certainly had the skills required for the position, but she kept getting the same comments on her performance review. “We like your work, but you’re a little too standoffish,” said one reviewer. “You’re a bit reserved,” said another, who then added, “You don’t even socialize well.”
The fact is, the woman is a bit of a nerd (and proud of it). Her friends are nerdy—they always have been. These are the people she likes to be around. Those she works with, however, aren’t like her. They enjoy more socializing both inside and outside the office. “When all my colleagues at my company go out to party, it’s not who I am,” she told me sadly. “So I’m working to change how I am.” I told her, “No. What you should be working at is changing jobs!”
Individuals like this woman accept jobs even though right from the beginning, they get the feeling they are out of step with everybody else.
Beautiful. Security often wins over our joy.
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